Emily E on women's worldwide struggle to obtain respect

It sucks being a woman...sometimes. Let me start by saying I am fully aware and love my curviness, pose and the inherent beauty that comes with being a woman. However (as many of you may know) it attracts attention whether you want it or not. Most women have heard the catcalls; the lingering eyes that go everywhere except your face.  We all can say it is the most uncomfortable thing in the world--this ‘intrusion’ in your personal bubble can be felt from across the street. In my hometown, I roll my eyes at these instances because what else is there do. As badly as I want to slap them in the face it goes against my principles, and I don’t want my mother bailing me out of jail.  I don’t know what made me think that this sort of thing would not follow me here to South Africa. Boy was I wrong! Since week one I’ve gotten numerously catcalled.  On the minibus on the way to internship, in the supermarket….There are construction workers by my internship site that constantly try to get my attention so I keep my gaze forward. One time I was standing for the minibus and one larger bus pulled up. A man was looking out the window and licked his lips at me. The nerve! I honestly am more unnerved about these things because an incident that happened to me on the city bus at home; but, that makes this even more important to discuss.

Women in all corners of the world are not immune to these experiences, and we are raised to expect these scenarios simply for being a woman. But this is the worst thing that girls have to grow up with. From one of my favorite shows the L Word, one of the main characters Jenny exposes her male roommate Mark for secretly filming her and her female companions’ escapades in the house.

Jenny: “Do you have any sisters?”
Mark: “Yes, I have two younger sisters.”
Jenny: “Okay. I want you to ask them a question. And the most important thing is that you really listen to their answer. I want you to ask your sisters about the very first time that they were intruded upon by some man or a boy.”
Mark: “What makes you think that my sisters have been intruded upon?”
Jenny: “Because there isn’t a single girl or woman in this world that hasn’t been intruded upon, and sometimes it’s relatively benign, and sometimes it’s so painful. But you have no idea what this feels like.”

Some of the male learners at my internship have asked personal questions about my love life and gave a few stare downs. As much as I hate it, I cannot completely fault them for doing so. It is what society has taught the young male population. Men are in control, and they are pleased to whatever they wish to when it comes to women.  There seems to be progression with gender equality since the Apartheid in South Africa; however, violence against women is still an issue. The instances of rape are very severe in townships like Khayelitsha, and the prostitution of young girls in Delft. However, this doesn’t make their scenario different from the acid attacks on women in places like the Middle East and South East Asia. We are in the 21^st century and women are still struggling to obtain respect and equality in the world.